im gonna shove this car into a locker
Do it. I dare you. Then, when you’re fast asleep in your bed, dreaming sweet dreams of cotton candy unicorns, they will come.
The fandoms will come for you.
"Oh whoops, ooooh. I dropped my monster condom that I use for my magnum dong."
the best thing about having the house to myself is that I can make breakfast in my underwear
i wonder how many people i’m in the “i’d be down if you asked” zone with
I WANT TO KNOW
how the hell do i talk to people
Stand in front of them and press A
I’m cute sometimes, why am I single?
Update: I’m now dating the girl I said this too
be a pal and like people’s text posts. reblog their selfies. respond to their questions. even if you don’t know the answer and even if you’ve never really talked to them before. there’s nothing worse that feeling alone on a website where everyone promotes love and friendship.
- on first date: So… uhm… What’s your favourite episode of The Walking Dead?
five nights at freddys more like
+10 years probably